Why do we value designer brands? What really is behind the psychology of blowing a bag for a Gucci bag? Why do we adore Dior or envy those with Fendi? (Ok I’ll get off of my Dr. Seuss s**t real quick).

Is self-expression an excuse for spending money on designer? My friend tells me it’s an investment in wearable art. To me, buying designer is really about appearances and what other people think.

Yes. I agree that designer brands ultimately have cooler products than their cheaper alternatives. It’s very unlikely that you’ll find anything remotely worthy of appearing on the Paris fashion week runways in Walmart. I guess splurging on some Gucci flip flops might bring some kind of retail therapy on a rainy day, but is it all worth it? (cue the dramatic music).

Some may argue that designer products are made better- with high quality fabrics and embellishments. Yes, they might be made with pony hair, but are those Golden Goose sneakers really worth $600… I mean, they look like a pair of Converse that’ve been through the ringer!

Designer brands have successfully brainwashed us into believing their products are worth racks on racks on racks. But, are we rationally thinking when we say designer is better, or are we being fooled by the constant flow of designer imagery in our Instagram feeds and the lyrics of our favorite rap songs?

Until yesterday, I would have agreed with the idea that designer IS better. Today, I can admit I fell victim to the all-mighty and all-powerful designer hex. About a month ago, I spent way too much on a hot pink metallic YSL bag. I thought it would bring some sort of validity that I am hot s**t.

I had barely used the purse because I was afraid to risk damaging it. Basically, the bag has been sitting on my desk in the same spot since I destroyed my life savings buying it. Well, yesterday I decided to move it to my closet, and when I picked it up I saw a sight that startled me so much I almost lost consciousness. The hot pink painted leather rubbed off and stuck onto the wall it was resting on. I can assure you that the bag was not exposed to moisture or pressure whilst sitting on the desk.

I guess it just turns out the $1850 bag’s Achilles heel is dry wall.

Here is a list of things you can buy for $1850 instead of a YSL bag that will fall apart in a temperature-controlled room:

• Round-trip flights to Italy, a two week stay in an Italian hostel, and $272 in change to spend
• Three months of my rent at my house in Chapel Hill
• A pure bred French Bulldog puppy with painted pink toenails
• Order a Chick-fil-a sandwich and hear “My Pleasure!” 506 times
• Take half of your body to the UNC Duke basketball game
• Invest in your 401k
• Buy this 2000 Subaru outback limited all -wheel drive off of craigslist.
• 616 gold Four Lokos, the perfect materials to throw a banger.
• 231 Blue Cups from He’s Not, 264 if you don’t tip (but that’s kind of mean j saying)
• Or 74 fake versions of this very YSL purse

I’ll leave you with this. A wise profit once wrote these words:

“Gucci Gucci, Louis Louis, Fendi Fendi, Prada. The basic bitches wear that s**t, so I don’t even bother” – Kreayshawn

Thank you Kreayshawn, I’ll take that all the way to the bank.